The older and more resigned about the world I get, the more I need this kind of story.
I posted recently about Quaden Bayles, the young Australian lad who has dwarfism. At nine years old, he wanted to die due to the relentless bullying he has experienced in his young life. After his mother posted a deeply disturbing video about the bullying, the better angels of the world descended in full force, starting a gofundme page to send Quaden and his mother to Disneyland.
But the story doesn't end there.
The family of Quaden Bayles, an Australian boy with dwarfism seen crying and expressing a desire to kill himself in a social media video last week, has declined a trip to Disneyland following a GoFundMe campaign, saying it will donate the funds to charity instead.While I really think they should use a bit of the money to take the boy to Disneyland, his mother's heart is in the right, life-affirming place.
"What kid wouldn't want to go to Disneyland, especially if you have lived Quaden's life. To escape to anywhere that is fun that doesn't remind him of his day to day challenges," Bayles' aunt Mundanara Bayles told Australia's NITV News on Thursday.
"But my sister said 'you know what, let's get back to the real issue'. This little fella has been bullied. How many suicides, black or white, in our society have happened due to bullying?" she added. "We want the money to go to community organizations that really need it. They know what the money should be spent on, so as much as we want to go to Disneyland, I think our community would far off benefit from that."
The family noted Dwarfism Awareness Australia and Balunu Healing Foundation as two organizations they would like to see benefit from the fund.In these dark days, I appreciate whatever rays of light I can catch.
"We need to come together and work out how to make sure young people like Quaden don't have to deal with what they have been dealing with," Bayles said. "We've had seven kids at the Murri School in Brisbane, where I am on the board, take their lives in the last ten years."
.. I recall a Conference my son & I shot in Halifax. One clinician spoke on ADD Attention Deficit Disorder. He pinned the vast audience of GP's & specialists, plus remote clinical audiences when he focused on 16 year old patients receiving treatment. As he described the symptomalogy and demographics. But when he pointed out that 'these kids grow up now, into adult world' .. driving automobiles, and at 18 or so add legal alcohol and msy enter the workplace and society at large.. all this in conjunction with facts. That very large cohort had seriously lower vision at night (like while driving) and adding alcohol just magnified the vision shortfall along with coordination of brain to muscle. 'They're adult now & don't go away'.
ReplyDeleteSo what of Bullying then ? At the young levels, its actually easy to identify them, especially in the classroom, schoolyard and after school. So at school its the classroom teachers, Vice Principal or exemplary Principals. They can't miss it. But those kids grow up too ! And leave behind, the primary level and whale into high school or trade schools or just leap right into the dropout world or the working world. Heck, they too get to drive then drink. And to the greatest extent they work. So again now, what of the bullies? Do they outgrow it ? Of course many do.. they 'grew up' and may filter into normalcy.. But there are so many and so many varients.. the physical or mean spirited or the clever manipulators, the conniving, the greedy. They're entrenched into family, workplace and society at large. At what point does bullying have the potential to evolve into the spectrum of Psychopath or Sociopath ? What is the impact on society ? How does one prevent or treat it ?
Where are we in Canada - in regard to bullying ? Many of us have seen it up close via public transit. Its damn uncomfortable when visible.. yet we must look out for it because we know it is there. I was bullied at varying ages of primary school by classmates and even teachers as well as at home.. I 'get it' .. I know how to spot its clues .. we can do far far better within the community, school, activities and neighborhood levels. There is a point too where local police need to show their face at community level.. certainly 'stalking' is an obvious bullying example within adulthood and road rage seems another 'adult' example as is a compulsion (not to be confused with need) to own weaponry..
I'm sure bullying will always be with us in one form or another, Sal, and while it is good that it is getting much more publicity and acknowledgment, part of the problem is that even today, people in positions of power are often reluctant to confront and try to remediate it. I remember a student being transferred into one of my classes three weeks after the semester had begun, the reason being that she had been bullied by some students in another course. Instead of taking on the bullies, the vice-principal handled it by changing the victim's entire schedule. That in essence victimized her a second time, the reason being that the VP lacked the fortitude to confront the perpetrators and their parents, who would have made a fuss about any consequences meted out. Such is/was the sad state of administrative integrity, at least in my experience.
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