Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Nearer My God To Thee

While Donald Trump was yesterday holding forth on Hurricane Florence in a manner that might make even a fourth-grader cringe (“They haven't seen anything like what's coming at us in 25, 30 years, maybe ever. It's tremendously big and tremendously wet. Tremendous amounts of water," Trump said in the Oval Office), the grandfather of crazed evangelicals everywhere was offering reassurances to his flock.

In a remarkable act of hubris, old pastor Pat Robertson suggested that he will save all good white Virginian Christians and the Christian Broadcasting Network in Virginia from impending doom:
“I don’t want that thing to come in,” Robertson said. “I don’t want it to hurt Regent, I don’t wait it to hurt CBN, I don’t want it to tear up the beautiful campus, I don’t want it to tear these trees down, I don’t want to see any damage, I don’t want a bunch of glass flowing, and I don’t want [damage] all over this area that is counting on us to pray for them.”

Robertson then commanded Florence, in the name of Jesus, to change its path away from land and to spin off into the Atlantic ocean.

We declare in the name of the Lord that you shall go no farther, you shall do no damage in this area,” he said. “We declare a shield of protection all over Tidewater and we declare a shield of protection over those innocent people in the path of this hurricane. In Jesus’ holy name, be out to sea!”
Unless you are gifted with a cast-iron constitution, I don't suggest you watch the full 3:25 minutes of the good pastor's exhortation:


  1. Replies
    1. When disaster strikes, I'm sure he will attribute it to a judgement by God of the faithlessness of the great unwashed and those who refuse to be complicit in the Trump agenda, Owen.

  2. Unfortunately Lorne, as is being demonstrated by our own, self described non politician, premier, evryone in Ontario no longer have a cast iron constitution.

  3. Oh well it's going to hit North Carolina, probably the most deserving spot for such things on America's eastern seaboard. It was North Carolina's legislature that passed a law basically against climate science. The law prohibited the use of anything but historical norms for sea level rise in state planning and policy. That encouraged developers and wealthy customers to keep building and settling in the very areas that this hurricane will first wipe out. Then, of course, this being America, the land of socialism for the rich, they'll be bitching for someone to cover their losses.

    1. Ah yes, the land of rugged individualism until something comes along to make them cry, Mound.